Penguins are cool!
In Oamaru, New Zealand, I saw the blue penguin.

Each night, the blue penguins swim to shore and live in burrows in the ground. These are the smallest penguins on earth at 9.8 inches (25cm) tall and weighing approximately 2.5 lbs. (a little over 1 kg). They have beautiful slate-blue plumage with a bright white belly.

Although these animals are such small creatures, they have a presence larger than life. They usually arrive on the beach in groups. They wait until the whole group is on land, then they proceed up the hill to their underground dwellings further inland where they start to quack and get social.

It is incredible to me that these tiny creatures are able to survive long journeys in the ocean with predators swimming literally amongst them. At sea, their lives are threatened by sharks, sea lions and leopard seals, not to mention the natural challenges of the ocean.

I feel like they survive for three key reasons: camouflage, community and consistency. They are camouflaged from both above and below having white bellies and blue backs so they are hidden from their predators. Their sense of community is very strong, they stick together as a group in the water and on land. For the most part they have life long partners; there is only a 6% “divorce” rate each year. Finally they have a consistent routine - each night they follow the same path and come ashore to the same underground burrows they call home.

TAKE ACTION! TIP:
We can certainly learn some survival and self care techniques from these penguins. Build appropriate “camouflage” (or boundaries) from “predators” or those that can harm us. Have a support system (whether one person or multiple people) that you can rely upon to prevent (and during) times of stress. Develop consistency in your life – consistency does not mean structure, it means a sense of reliability and authenticity.

Hope you had a wonderful holiday weekend!
See you next week!

Make Happiness Yours,
Susan
email: info@susankimcoaching.com

HAPPY VALENTINE’S DAY!

Love is in the air. . . and I’m not referring to the heart shaped candy boxes or the long stem roses that we often see around this time of the year. The “love” I am thinking of is toward our neighbor, our friend, our family and our fellow human being.

This year is the 10th Anniversary of V-Day (www.vday.org), a global movement to end violence against women and girls that raises funds and awareness through benefit productions of Playwright/Founder Even Ensler’s award winning play “The ‘V’ Monologues.”

Two years ago I had the honor of being a cast member of the V-Day production on Maui, Hawaii. The experience opened my eyes not only to the terrible abuse toward women and girls that already exists in our world, but also showed me the love and support available to victims of violence. The performance united people of different race, religion and political association. Talk about non-partisanship! This year I am volunteering by helping with the production and fundraising for V-Day 2008 on Maui (www.vdaymaui.com). The magic is happening again. We have our public servants and administrators from both parties, contributing to the performance and reading for the event.

Two things I want to point out:
1. Throughout the violence and destruction that we often see and read about in the world today, know that at the same time there is also the birth of love and support that shows up just as strong, if not stronger.

2. A common purpose, that comes from love and support, can unite even the most steadfast opponents.

Silence empowers violence and creates victims.
Awareness and Action empowers victims to become Survivors.

Some ways you can Take Action!

1. Find a local event.
Visit http://events.vday.org/search.php to find an event near you.

2. Spread the word.
Share your local event with your family, friends and colleagues. Just by spreading the word, you can save a life and help support someone to survive. Also, participate in the “V to the Tenth” event on April 12th, 2008 in New Orleans.

3. Get the facts.
Violence is an issue that plagues all women and men in every part of the world. Here are some statistics about rape, incest, battery, FGM, sex slavery/trafficking. Also for more information, here is an Anti-Violence Resource Guide (http://www.feminist.com/antiviolence/).

4. Organize a V-Day event.
If you would like to host a V-Day event in your College, Community or High School, you can find out more and register here: http://v10.vday.org/take-action/organize-a-local-group

5. Get help.
If you are in need of immediate medical attenton or police assistance in the United States, dial 9-1-1 on your telephone.
If you or someone you know has experienced violence in the United States, call:
National Domestic Violence Hotline: 800-799-7233
Rape, Abuse & Incest National Network (RAINN): 800-656-HOPE (4673)
For assistance in other countries or to learn more, please visit the Anti-Violence Resource Guide (http://www.feminist.com/antiviolence/)

Wishing you Love and Happiness,
Susan?

Technorati Tags: VDay, Vagina Monologues, life coach on Maui, Hawaii events, stop violence

They say that “No man is an island,” and I would have to agree. Whether in business or in your personal life, relationships matter and have a large impact on your well being. As people, we were made to relate and be companions to each other, so when your relationships are confused and unhappy, our lives feel the same.

Relationships influence our body, mind and spirit. Do you notice that after a difficult phase in life your body feels tired, drained? Have you been caught in a moment of pure love for someone and felt the rush of energy? Is it hard to concentrate and focus when there is “drama” in your relationships - good or bad? Then you know what I mean.

Although relating is natural for us, sometimes our relationships are not quite where we want them to be or perhaps they are even hurting us. The best way to enhance your relationships is to improve your Self. Think about it, the common factor in all of your relationships is YOU!

Just like we have to exercise our muscles to be fit, we also have to “work out” our relationships to be healthy and strong.

Below are three Take Action! tips on how to “exercise” your relationships to strengthen and tone up.

#1. RELATIONSHIP SYSTEM
A relationship is a system that combines two individual systems - “You” and “Me” (the other person in the relationship), where each individual affects the outcome of the relationship. Given this model, think about how you are affecting the system. Each adjustment of your actions will somehow change the overall system.
Take Action! - Try it out. . .change your behavior just a little by tweaking something in your relationship. Start with something small. A good exercise to begin is to make a list of three columns:
Column #1: List the challenges/difficulties in your relationship.
Column #2: Write out the usual reaction/response when this situation occurs.
Column #3: Write out how you’re going to “tweak” it - give yourself some options to look at and then decide on one.

#2. RELATIONSHIPS START WITH YOU
The key to the “Relationship System” is that each individual is a separate whole person and is in integrity within themselves, not relying on or being dependent on the other. The relationship winds up being a natural and organic result of two people coming together to enhance the world of the other. Therefore, a healthy relationship starts with a healthy “You,” mentally, physically and spiritually.
Take Action! - Think about how you are contributing to the challenge you listed in #1. Also ask yourself honestly and with integrity, “What will it take for me to be complete?” Start taking care of your Self, giving to your Self and allowing your Self to LIVE. Not only will YOU feel great, but your relationships will improve in parallel!

#3. BOUNDARIES, NOT A MOAT
Relationships are about connecting with people, but boundaries enable us to protect ourselves from the potentially damaging affects of the world around us by discerning negative influences that surround us. Boundaries protect the individual from harm from the outside by letting the right people and behavior in, it does not serve to keep people out like a moat.
Take Action! - Top Three Steps to Building Boundaries:
1. Start Right Away -the sooner you start creating boundaries, the easier it becomes.
2. Be Clear - the better you can articulate your boundaries, the easier it is for others to understand and honor them.
3. Create Fair Boundaries - test your boundaries by asking if you would accept the boundary for someone else. If it is difficult to do, then ask yourself if it’s a fair boundary and adjust.

Technorati Tags: balance, relationships, boundaries, self care, personal development, action, accountability, couples